I love Jesus.
I love purple.
I'm scared shitless. ( I KNOW!! You're thinking.."She loves Jesus and she just said shit!" It's just a word people, and it 100 percent describes how scared I am.
Someone told me I talk too much about having cancer. ( Um, I don't know how NOT to talk about it. )
I don't know how I'd get through this without Jesus, my husband, or my church. ( all amazing )
I really don't know much about my cancer, because I'm scared to death to google it. ( I have found one blog about it, and she's so very inspirational. )
Oh, in my previous blog I said that people tell me " it's great news that it's treatable. But really, they just don't get it. It's cancer. It won't be easy." I didn't mean offense, but really no one does get it. You can't understand. I'm sorry if I sounded bitchy. It's just reality. I never got it either..til I got to wear this 'cancer hat'. Please know I so love all the encouragement..I'm just being real here..to get it all out. <3
I am tired all of the crackin' time. Always. Then I lay in bed so exhausted and can't sleep. It's so frustrating I could cry.
I have a lil dog Izzie, who sits under my chair outside to protect me of the evils of the world..like my husband. ha.
My first oncology appointment is Tuesday, and I am scared..well you got the idea above. I'm also going alone, my hubby has to work..and no one else is available to go with me. That scares me too. I don't want to miss something really important the DR. says, that another set of ears could hear. Ah well, such is life. Jesus will be with me.
I drink water all day long and it has to be ICE cold. Love water.
I'm in love with iced coffee. Sugar free vanilla iced coffees with a splenda and a little extra 1/2 and 1/2. If you want to get in my good graces..bring me one of those. I'll love you forever.
I got prayer from our personal prayer team yesterday morning and it was more than words can describe. I have yet to read the notes my friend ( who's on the prayer team ) jotted down for me. One thing I can say, is it's funny how God can bring something up that you really weren't aware of. He's really amazing. He is peace.
My nieces and nephews are the light of my life. Seriously they can make me smile no matter how I am feeling. Here are a few pics of them:
Alicia, Aliya and Avi.
Prettiest girls ever.
Jeramyah and Elijah ( they're tough, can't ya tell?)
With that, I'll end my randomness.
Peace and blessings to you and yours.
I love your writing - it's like having a conversation with you. The Big C has touched the lives of so many people in my life, so when I hear it's treatable I celebrate cuz the one I love has a chance to beat the crap outta Cancer! I know you're in for a battle and it won't be easy at times and probably scary all the time, but you have all of us behind you, loving you, pulling for you, praying for you - you can't help but win the fight <3
ReplyDeleteHey there! It's Em. One of these days I will register to post! Nothing to say really, just dropping by to see your new posting. So glad you are blogging!!!!!!! Love, Em
ReplyDeleteHi Elena, you know......it's ok to be scared, angry, and overwelmed. People tell you till they are blue in the face that everything is going to be ok.Still doesn't make you feel any better.A word of advised....take it one day at a time. Don't worry about tomorrow or the next day. Just live for today.I wish I lived closer I know we would become good friends. We are here for you to give you encouragement and listen to you when you feel alone. Hugs Sandra
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